Or, Don’t Feel the Love: 6 Memphis Anti-Valentine’s Day Dates
In the spirit of this classic I Love Memphis post, here are six “anti-date” ideas. Think of them as an alternative to the candles-and-roses shtick – whether you’re coupled, consciously uncoupled, single, Super Single ™ , or you just don’t care.
Anti-Date No. 1: Love and Loss (Mostly Loss)
Bundle up, grab some friends and go on Elmwood Cemetery’s special Valentine’s day tour, which promises to be filled with “tales of love gone horribly, horribly wrong”. I recently went to Elmwood Cemetery and it was incredibly interesting and huge. 10 out of 10, would recommend.
The walking tour begins at 1 p.m. and is $15. Register ASAP (spots are limited) by calling 901-774-3212.
Anti-Date No. 2: Baked Goods Tour of Memphis, 2016 edition
The great thing about cake is that it tastes just as good when you eat it alone. Some ideas: Get some (chocolate) Prozac at Muddy’s. Grab a cupcake from Pink Diva Cupcakery (fresh flavors daily). Eat a whole strawberry cake from Frost Bake Shop (no judgement).
More sweet ideas: Pick up a bag of buttery goodness at Makeda’s. Get a slice of cheesecake from the Cheesecake Corner or Carol’s Cheesecakes. Try some gelato or a crepe from the new Scoops Parlor on GE Patterson. Enjoy some locally-made candy from Dinstuhl’s or Shotwell.
What is your sweet treat of choice?
Anti-Date No. 3: Laugh To Keep From Crying
The Break-Up Show is a variety show created by Memphians that celebrates the trials and tribulations of dating in the modern world. Think bad date re-enactments, Tinder horror stories, video skits, and text message breakups.
This Friday, Feb. 12 the BUS will put on a “best of” show with some of their favorite material. Doors open at 7 p.m. at 1884 Lounge at Minglewood Hall and tickets are $15. Adult material, ages 21+ only. There’s an after-party at DKDC with James & The Ultrasounds. Details here.
Anti-Date No. 4: Take Out Your Frustrations On Pinball Machines
Don’t let love get you down. Instead, show your pinball prowess and competitive spirit this Saturday on machines like Royal Rumble, Sharkey’s Shootout, and Wizard.* Memphis Pinball hosts The Tiltled Hearts Tournament at 2 p.m. at Garibaldi’s Pizza by The University of Memphis.
There is a $10 buy-in to play, but no quarters are necessary. It’s a triple-elimination tournament. Be sure to get there on time or a couple of minutes early to ensure your spot. Get details and rules here.
*Machine lineup is subject to change.
Anti-Date No. 5: Refuse To Go Anywhere
No-Show Balls are one of my favorite fundraising ideas and there’s one happening this weekend in Memphis. Here’s how it works: instead of dropping lots of cash on a ticket to a fancy party, plus the expense of outfits, transportation, babysitters, etc., Forrest Spence Fund folks will deliver a cooler full of food and wine to your house.
The Forrest Spence Fund No-Show Ball “tickets” are $100 and include enough ravioli, salad, dessert, and bread for four people plus a bottle of wine. It will be delivered to your home (within the city limits) between 11:30 a.m. and 2 p.m. on Saturday, Feb. 13. You can pick up if you live outside of the Memphis city limits. Sign up here.
Anti-Date No. 6: TRUCK SMASH
The only thing more American than being pressured to spend lots of money on red and pink things on an arbitrary day in February is to cheer as tricked-out giant vehicles named “Wild Thing” and “Northern Nightmare” smash into each other to bits in a huge arena.
The Monster Jam monster truck rally is at FedExForum this Friday and Saturday (Feb. 12 – 13) at 7 p.m. and tickets range are $25 – $35 at the Club Level.
If you’re looking for more traditional ideas, check out the 2016 Guide To Valentine’s In Memphis (a few of these make an appearance on that list, too.)
If you hate Valentine’s day, what do you normally do to mark the day?