Random Love Letter to Midtown Schnucks

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Random Love Letter to Midtown Schnucks

Dear Midtown Schnucks,

I love you. I love you for all of the things you are, and for all of the things that you're not.

Because, honestly, Midtown Schnucks, you're not a very good grocery store. Sure, like all grocery stores, you sell food. It's just that you've got your quirks. If I just come to shop, no list in mind, you're reliable. Whenever I visit you to get a specific need met, whatever that thing is - be it popsicles or cilantro - you can't provide.

Midtown Schnucks by reallyboring on Flickr

I love that you're a challenge. Your parking lot is the only one I've ever been in that doesn't have a single good parking space. Even the ones that seem like good ideas rarely are. You aren't terribly deliberate or well thought out. Like Walnut Grove in the 1980s, when you needed more lanes, they were crammed in without thought to their harrowing narrowness (or the placement of the building's support columns).

But still, Midtown Schnucks. I can't do without you. You're one of the main social hubs of the city. You're a true melting pot, a place where you can mingle with Memphians from all walks of life (Mayor Wharton and Steve Cohen shop there). You've reintroduced me to friends from high school, lost loves and work contacts.

Your cookies are always fresh. You're open all night (in fact, you're at your most tolerable after 10 p.m.). I've noticed an inordinate amount of people on dates contemplating the offerings in the freezer section.

We may have our issues, Midtown Schnucks, but you're always there when I need you. Let's keep seeing each other (and everyone else I've ever met).

<3,

Kerry

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David
Did you know Schnucks' regional office is right across the parking lot in the first floor of that residential tower? That's right, the region's top brass see this store's mess every day -- filthy aisles, empty shelves, busted freezers, overflowing lines -- and they don't lift a finger to make it right. Meanwhile, their locations out east are quite nice. To me, this shows that Schnuck's holds Midtown in contempt. We're talking almost CVS levels of contempt. I won't shop there, and I hope the Overton Square grocery drives them out.
March 31, 2011 10:13am
Ashley
True dat.
March 31, 2011 10:14am
Liz
Thanks for giving our neighborhood market a little tough love. You see the sage when most of us can only see the schnook.
March 31, 2011 10:17am
Lizzy
YESSS!!! We refer to Midtown Schnucks as Cornerstore Schnucks, because it is definitely more like a cornerstore than a grocery store. I still go 4-5 times a week and have fun 2-3 of those times.
March 31, 2011 10:20am
Bekah
I love this, Kerry! Made me laugh & nod along in agreement :)
March 31, 2011 10:21am
Shannan
I can't believe you didn't mention the way they shoved a 10lb grocery store into a 5lb sack. The way the aisles in that place are set up is CRAZY. But yeah... I go there like once a week, too.
March 31, 2011 10:26am
Sonny
Yeah, it's got me out of a lot of jams, food jams that is.
March 31, 2011 10:30am
Ava
Um, you need a vacation. What are you going to write about next, the toilets at Young Ave Deli?
March 31, 2011 10:34am
Manfred
The Deli? Try the P&H.
March 31, 2011 10:46am
Anthony
Such an accurate description. I love its quirkiness!
March 31, 2011 10:49am
Alexandra
The toilets at the YAD are much better than they used to be, at least in the girls bathroom. As for the men's the trough has stayed on the wall for years unlike the urinals that were constantly ripped off during shows. While they may have been some of the worst bathrooms a few years ago I can now think of many that are much worse now.
March 31, 2011 11:45am
Jarrod
It's like they designed the parking lot so they could watch a demolition derby every day.
March 31, 2011 12:19pm
Ash
I can't go there without getting mad. When I was a kid, they handed out free lady fingers. The baggers spoke to the customers instead of only amongst themselves. It was clean! It was everything it is not now. I only go there if I have to, and yes, I always see someone I know, but hey, it's midtown. I'm told this is the largest grossing Schnuck's in the city? I feel used whenever I go there.
March 31, 2011 12:31pm
Rebecca R
LOVE this - I couldn't have said it better.
March 31, 2011 12:42pm
kelsey maynard
i hate the terrible attitudes of the cashiers, the scary conditions in the fish department, and the lack of anything that you need. However, it is still WAY better than the Piggly Wiggly on Madison (the dirties grocery on the planet) and the Kroger on Poplar (where the fear of being stabbed stays with you the whole time). The standars of groceries in Midtown is unacceptably low. Why?
March 31, 2011 1:08pm
Teresa
I still miss Seessel's every time I walk in the door. The staff at the meat counter, deli (except one lady) and bakery are never nice and they never have brie and gorgonzola torte. Having said all that - I love having a midtown grocery store and hey, pretty much everything else in midtown is quirky, that's why I love it.
March 31, 2011 2:27pm
Scarlett
I love this post and couldn't agree with you more! Midtown Schnucks has it's quirks, but still I choose to go there multiple times each week for my grocery needs.
March 31, 2011 2:41pm
Hamlett
Even when I lived a two blocks away at the Kimbrough, I would drive all the way out east to the Schnucks on Poplar near Clark Tower just so I could actually get everything on my list. It's well worth it. Life is just too short for the midtown Schnucks.
March 31, 2011 6:45pm
Dave L
Take a left at the olive bar, a right at the soft cheese, another right at the organic sodas, left at the deli and, wait. Where am I???
March 31, 2011 7:06pm
WGO
Small grocery stores can be done well but this is not an example of that. I'm sick of midtown people proclaiming their love of crappy. There is a difference between unique character and crap.
April 1, 2011 8:35am
Ty
Yeah... No I can't vouch for Schnucks either. The location in Germantown is in a different universe than the one in Midtown. So much so we called the Germantown location the "Gucci" Schnucks (If the term Gucci can be applied to a clean, orderly store and nice clerks). I am hoping for ANY other grocery store to be built at Overton Square. On the upside if you are a writer, there are always some great characters doing their shopping, to get material from.
April 1, 2011 6:20pm
Claire R.
Midtown Schnucks-the store you love to hate! The parking lot is inexcusable, the store is dirty and cramped, and yet...and yet...it's there when you need it.
April 1, 2011 9:10pm
Jc
It's the best! Period! (for Memphis, that is)
April 3, 2011 3:34pm
Robyn
The meat department STINKS horribly and the P.M. deli staff is EVIL, actually refusing to allow you to purchase meat as early as 2 hours before the posted closing time unless you threaten legal action. As a 2nd shift family, we REALLY need a reliable place to stop that is convenient to our schedule, but whenever we actually "break down" and shop there, my husband vows, NEVER AGAIN.
April 3, 2011 5:03pm
Leah
Seafood Department at this Schnuck's is completely scary. I would NEVER eat fish from this Schnuck's. Prefer to drive out to Whole Foods or Fresh Market for fresh seafood.
April 4, 2011 9:20pm
Joe
The parking spaces are as narrow as mentioned Walnut Grove lanes, and I've almost become roadkill trying to pull out of that lot more than once. That said... It's been years (and years) since I was in Memphis last, and this article slammed some great nostalgia in my face. Thank you for writing it.
May 26, 2011 9:09pm

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